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MARRIAGE BEGINS AT FIVE!
1/1/1900

Release topic is about marriage and the need to educate American children earlier in order to offset high divorce rates and serial marriages. Quotes by authors and therapists are included along with Connecticut news tv special info.

MARRIAGE BEGINS AT FIVE!

“By age five,” say Doctors Linda and Robert Miles, marriage and family therapists, “children have already formed strong ideas about what marriage should be. They have pretend weddings. Boys swear they'll marry their mothers, while girls are smitten with Daddy. Five-year-olds live in a world defined by imaginary experiences and the messages underlying childhood myths—the fairy tales and fables passed down through generations. These become an integral part of the individual, and affect decision-making far beyond childhood.”

With the national divorce rate now at 50–60 percent, and the phenomenon of “starter marriages,” where young people marry and are divorced within five years, there's a strong need to begin teaching children good models of marriage. Otherwise, the state of marriage will continue to weaken. Drs. Miles, authors of The New Marriage: Transcending the Happily-Ever-After Myth, emphasize, “Fairy tales are comforting to children at an early stage of development, but the dangers of such beliefs when carried into adulthood are obvious. How many women wait a lifetime for their imaginary childhood prince to carry them off to live happily ever after? And how many men never stop searching for ‘the perfect 10' as their ideal mate?”

The authors assert that change is crucial as children move into adolescence and adulthood. “Solutions that protect us in childhood become inadequate as we mature. By five, children need to begin learning to see real-life situations realistically in order to be able to assess relationships sensibly later in life. They need to be taught how to separate childhood fantasy from the real world, and learn to create relationships based on understanding the imperfections in real people. But we spend more time teaching kids how to operate computers and electronic toys than we do teaching them what to look for in a mate and how to be a good one.”




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