Dating when you have children or dating single parents can be confusing, so we offer some advice on how to make such dating easier. We give you ideas on talking to your kids and some tips for people that do not have kids but are dating single parents that have children.
Advice to Others With Dating Problems
Problem
"I started dating Chris at an online dating site about 5 months ago. He just told me that he has an eight year old daughter. I always told myself that I would not go out with people who have kids. But over the last five months I've really grown to like him." Lauri.
Advice
No, it isn't easy dating singles with a child. This means that he cannot focus all his energies in to your dating. But then again, it could also be good insight on how he is as a father figure if you are thinking about a future with this person. Keep in mind that even though you are dating, he will always have this connection with another woman. Are you ready for a relationship like that? But it has been done before and you aren't the first person dating someone with kids.
Problem
"Me and Rhonda have been together now for over two years. We thought it was great that our kids were all around the same age, but they do not get along one bit. It is causing a strain on our relationship. We cannot have one normal dinner without the kids fighting. Is this relationship doomed to fail?" Mike.
Advice
Mike, dating and kids is like marriage and kids. Pretend they are all real brothers and sisters. Siblings fight too and just like if you two were the parents, you have to learn to set ground rules. If you are both planning to keep dating, you have to either give each other authority over each others kids so that you are respected, or you will not make it because the kids will divide you. It is that simple. Do not let them get involved and be strong enough to tell them when they are out of line.
Problem
"I have been divorced for over two years. I am ready to start dating but do not know how to talk to my 12 year old son about it yet. I have sort of spoiled him since the divorce." Phillis.
Advice
The best way to talk to your son about dating, is by being honest. Tell him how you feel and that you would like to start seeing people again. Make sure to let him know that he is still very important in your life and that nothing will change that. He might be worried that by you dating, another man will take his place. But it is not his choice, you cannot live your life by the whims of a twelve year old kid. Do not be afraid, your son will adjust just the way he did to your divorce.
Problem
"I have been dating this woman for about 6 months now and her son is still causing many problems between us. He pretends to be sick before we go out and acts up when he comes with us. I told her that she needs to stop babying him but she does not listen. What should I do?" Kevin.
Advice
She is obviously worried about her son so much that it is affecting your dating life. You are probably right that she needs to stop babying him but telling her is only going to make you look like you are against her. If you want to keep dating her, talk to her about it. Tell her that this is disrupting your relationship and that she had got to notice the problem with her son. She needs to let her son know that you are not going anywhere and he needs to be less selfish. But it is only up to her to fix it. You either have to deal with it or stop dating.